Editorial

5 conversations you should have before moving-in together

Cohabiting is becoming normal and its even reckoned that about 60% of marriages begin like this. So is it a good way to find out if you’re really cut out

  • PublishedJuly 25, 2017

Cohabiting is becoming normal and its even reckoned that about 60% of marriages begin like this. So is it a good way to find out if you’re really cut out to be together?

 WTH are we doing?

It better not be just because it saves you money! Granted, moving in together will cut on costs, but just because something makes sense from a money perspective doesn’t mean it is the right decision. You should both articulate why you want to start living together and what both of you expect out of it.

The money talk.

It will get uncomfortable but talking about your finances before hand will save you a lot of unnecessary fights. Determine how you’ll split the household expenses; inclusive of the groceries, rent, personal and even pet expenses. Try having a ‘his, hers and ours’ expenditure list and splitting finances equivalently based on how much each of you earns, if you do.

Household responsibilities.

If you expect your partner to do your laundry, cook, do the dishes and basically maintain the household just because she’s the woman, you’re a couple of decades too late. It’s the 21st century and women have demanding jobs too. For successful cohabitation, divvy up household responsibilities based on personal interests, free time and talents. Don’t force your woman to cook if she’s terrible at it and worse doesn’t enjoy it, yet you really love it and are extremely good at it.

4. When it ends, if it does.

No, you will not jinx your relationship if you think about possibilities of its ending. Shacking up may be a step towards marriage but what if it doesn’t work out? As you live together, you’ll definitely buy a couple of things together; you may even decide to get a pet. You need to have a break up plan. Decide who’s going to go with what, who keeps the house/apartment or the pet and save yourself drama in case it doesn’t work out.

The sex.

Your sex life is definitely going to change. Thank God to no more scheduled sex but not every night will end with the two of you naked, sticky, and sweaty. According to sexologists when you’re around one another all the time, the frequency of sexual activity may taper off. Talk about how you’ll build on the intimacy; it isn’t always about sex. Date nights and romantic getaways should be part of your schedule. Also, don’t lose your sexy, dress up as usual, amp up your lingerie, and make the sex as spicy as never before!

 

 

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