It is never anyone's dream to be living off of their parents when they are 30 years of age. Unfortunately, with the current economic times, jobs have become hard to come by. While it may be hard for parents to provide for a grown-up child, it is harder, especially for sons.
As a parent, there are several ways you can support your unemployed adult son or daughter as follows:
It is very easy as a parent to fly off the handle especially if your child has lost their job because of what you term as negligence. Before shouting at them, try to understand what they are going through. Most people fall into depression after losing their jobs, you reminding them how it is their fault does not help matters.
Open your doors
If you are in a position to host your adult son or daughter, welcome them back home instead of sending them money for rent and other expenses. While they are living with you, make sure you don't nag them with questions of how their job search is going now and then.
Remember your child is an adult and treat them as one
It may be tempting to micromanage your adult son or daughter just because they are living with you. It would however do the two of you good if you let your child figure out the next phase of their lives by themselves. Trust that they are adult enough to make the best decisions for themselves.
Avoid helping where your help is not sought
As a parent, you may feel an overwhelming urge to help your child. Unfortunately, the help may not be welcome. In fact, at times, it may hurt your child's pride and strain your relationship with them. Ensure that you ask if your child needs help before offering it. The same goes for advice.
Encourage your child to do things that they enjoy
If your child is fresh out of college, not being able to secure employment can be devastating especially in light of the dreams they had while still in school. At this point, most people will lose interest in everything they ever enjoyed. Try and encourage your child to keep working on things they enjoy. You can also encourage them to find an internship or volunteer activities. These will keep them busy and equip them with important skills that will come in handy when they finally get a job.
Give them a loan
If the job search is not going too well and your child has a business idea, you can support them by loaning them the starting capital. Make it clear that what you are giving is a loan and not a gift. This is helpful especially if you have an overly dependent child. Otherwise, giving it as a loan encourages your child to work hard. It also lets them know that you still believe and trust in them as opposed to viewing them as a charity case.
Help them network
You may know some places that could be hiring people with your child's education and skills. If you do, it is a good idea to point your child in that direction and provide names where you can. However, ensure that you don't make the application on behalf of your child. Prospective employers may interpret this to mean that your child lacks confidence and this will work against them in the long run.
It's every parent's joy to watch their children succeed and raise families of their own. However, things don't always go as planned. If your adult child is not able to secure a job or they have lost their job, be supportive and help where you can without being too intrusive and overbearing.
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