Raising a child could be a challenging task especially after the separation of parents. Your child has a right to have a relationship with the other parent and should be free from your influence. It may seem impossible to work with your ex-partner, but it is doable if you both want the best for your child.
Here are some tips to help you raise your child with your ex-partner.
Do it as a team
Raising a child involves making a lot of decisions. Involving your ex-partner in making these decisions will make things easier for everyone and especially the child. Constant communication and teamwork with your co-parent will reduce setbacks that would arise if you made the decision on your own and the other parent does not agree to it.
Maintain a routine
High chances are that you do not live in the same house with your co-parent. You as parents can work together and formulate basic routines and rules that that will help you raise your child in the two different environments. Try as much to set similar routines in both houses that the child can adapt easily each time your child transitions. These routines and structures will help your child thrive.
Set aside anger and hurt
Co-parenting is not about how you feel about your ex-partner or what transpired between the two of you. It is more about your child’s future, well-being, happiness, education, and stability. Owning your emotions and putting your anger away for the sake of your child may be the hardest thing for you to do, but will prove to be a vital decision for raising a better child.
Tell your child the truth
Do not lie to your child about what happened and why things are the way they are but at the same time, package the information in a way that they can understand at their age. As you co-parent, reassure your child that you love them. Separation can pose a challenge to the child in adapting to the new life situation.
Avoid saying anything bad about your co-parent
Avoid saying anything negative about the other parent to your child as much as possible. Your child loves you both, talking ill of the other parent will make the child form a negative attitude towards them. As a result, it becomes very hard for the child to have a strong and healthy relationship with your co-parent.
Get your child some counselling
It is important for you as parents to recognize that your separation may have affected your child negatively and that the child is most likely having a hard time coping. Different children cope differently. Some children may develop anger issues and experience sadness. Find someone your child can freely speak to in this difficult time.
Proper Communication will be essential to the success of co-parenting. It all begins with your mindset and before taking any action against or with your co-parent ask yourself how such actions will affect your child. Make your child the priority in every decision you want to make with your ex-partner.
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