Editorial

5 mistakes to avoid as first-time parents

No one is born ready to be a parent. As a result, first-time parents have to learn at the job. Most of the time, the learning process involves trial and

5 mistakes to avoid as first-time parents
  • PublishedJuly 1, 2021

No one is born ready to be a parent. As a result, first-time parents have to learn at the job. Most of the time, the learning process involves trial and error as you try to figure out what is right for you and your child.

In the process of learning you will make mistakes. However, these should not discourage you because mistakes provide a learning opportunity.  For you to get the lessons, you must be able to identify the mistake and avoid a repeat.

Here are some of the common mistakes that first time parents make.

Not fixing problems

Sometimes you as a first time parent may give up on trying to fix problems that your child has. You may not give to much attention to what your child problems are simply because you think they are not fixable. Often new parents make this mistake of not knowing what to do to fix certain problems in a child such as high child temper and you end up assuming them.

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Always fighting back

It is not a good sign when you find yourself arguing with your child. Inasmuch as you are their first friend, they should also know that you have authority over them. Make a decision and stand by it. Ensure that both you and your spouse show a united front to your child. Otherwise, the child may end up thinking you are weak and oppose everything you tell them.

Having high expectations

It is good to expect your child to behave in a certain way  or undertake certain activities at particular levels. Nevertheless, you must ensure that you are not pressuring to achieve standards they cannot.

High expectations will almost always leave you frustrated and this could affect your relationship with your child. Instead, limit your expectations, celebrate every small milestone your child makes and let them grow at their pace.

Parenting inconsistencies

Inconsistent parents display confusing behaviour to their children. For instance, one day you are an authoritative parent and the next you are an indulgent one. Shifting from one style of parenting to another within short periods affects your child both mentally and emotionally. As a result, your child is always scared and having difficulty deciding how you expect them to behave.

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Not setting limits and house rules

Setting up ground rules for your child is essential as these, to some extent, dictate your child’s moral values and behaviour. As a first time parent, you may be too indulgent and unwilling to punish your child. Unfortunately, by doing so, you are well on a path of raising a spoilt child that may not respect anyone.

The takeaway

The way you bring up your child will determine how they turn out in future. If you are a first time parent without prior experience, the pressure to raise a well behaved child can be overwhelming. Avoiding some of the common mistakes first time parents make, goes a long way in reducing some of the pressure.

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