When you have your first baby and it’s no longer you and your partner against the world, there are some adjustments you need to make in order to adapt. It is important to note that things will not always be the same in your relationship and these changes might throw you off balance at the beginning.However, both of you got this, and can work around your new role as parents.
Changes to expect
Sex & Intimacy
Sex will seem like a chore as you will prefer using that extra time for sleep. This does not mean that you won’t love your partner, you’ll just love the rest more.
Money is an overwhelming issue for new parents. You want to give your baby the best and might start saving for their education as early as possible. Therefore, expect a whole lot of money talk with your partner.
You will no longer have free time for yourself as most of your time will be divided between your partner, baby, and family, all at once! Unfortunately, the baby will take most of it, unless you and your partner are intentional about creating some time for yourselves and your relationship.
Chores seem to double after having a baby. You can’t procrastinate tasks as much as you used to. You baby’s clothes for one, have to be washed frequently.
How to navigate
Accept help during this time. Allow your partner to take up some responsibilities and work as a team. This will help the process seem less overwhelming as you won’t have to do it all by yourself.
Most couples swear by the power of communication in a relationship. It makes the bond tighter and problems solvable. Take advantage of communication and incorporate it into your relationship. Talk about how you feel being new parents, your fears, and joys.
Explore other intimacies
You sex life doesn’t have to go to the drain because you had a baby. There are many ways through which you and your partner can connect and find intimacy. The trick is to give it time first then get creative. Find activities to bring that spark. It could be date nights, role plays and even intimate conversations. Anything that does it for you.
Do not put pressure on yourself or your partner. Understand that you’re both new to parenting and won’t have it all figured out immediately. Accept mistakes as an opportunity to learn and do it different the next time and appreciate your efforts in navigating your new role as parents.
Create personal time
Time to yourself, as a new parent, is a luxury. When you find it, grab it! Don’t lose yourself in parenthood. Find time to do the things you love and just enjoy being you.
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