Transitioning from one child to two
The first few weeks after delivering your second child are a roller coaster of emotions. Healing from delivery, caring for your toddler and a newborn, battling sleep deprivation, attending to your husband’s needs and your needs are among other things that make the transition difficult.
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You’ll never be fully prepared for the bumpy transition from hip easy-going mum of one kid to a hedgy mum of two. It’s okay. You’ll soon learn how to manage all these and multi-task to cater for the needs of your kids. The journey is never easy but along the way you will learn how to juggle. Here are some tips to ensure you have a smooth transition.
1.Create a routine
With a set schedule, you and your kids know what to expect and have something to look forward to each day. Children easily adapt to and thrive on routines. Chances are, you already have a routine with your first child.
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If possible, please maintain it. Nap, meal and bed times should stay constant to provide a sense of stability to your older child who by now feels neglected. Have the goal of getting your children on the same nap, bedtime and meal schedule.This may take time but once it happens, you’ll feel so much relief.
New routines for your infant should also be integrated in your family’s daily life.
Don’t just set routines for others. Create one for yourself because you need care too. Set a day for your laundry, pedicure, cleaning the house and grocery shopping.
2.Take time to know your baby
Babies are different as is everyone. Chances are they won’t behave exactly like their older sibling. Whatever worked for the first one may not work on the new one and vice versa. Getting to know them helps in knowing how to handle them and even getting a schedule that works for them.
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Be open-minded and understand that each child has a different way in which they operate.
3. Shower and dress
Your kids are usually clean, well fed and have a set time to rest. You are no less important than your kids. Find time to take a shower and even wear nice clothes. While it’s tempting to walk in sweat pants and pajamas all day, dressing up once in a while will leave you feeling confident, in control and at ease. Don’t forget yourself.
4. Get all the help you can
There is no award for the solo mom of the year. If getting a nun works for you get one if you can afford two get them. Don’t push away your spouse. Asking for extra support from them should be communicated. They don’t always realize you need it. Speak to them in a way that makes them understand their support is important. It even gives them time to bond with the older sibling.
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However, don’t always put your spouse in charge of the oldest. Encourage him to get his one-on-one time with your newborn as you bond with your first-born.
5. Assure your first-born that you haven’t forgotten about them
Bringing in a new baby in the family is the same feeling a first wife feels when told wife number two is coming. They are there to stay forever. Everything that was yours becomes hers too. It’s almost the same for older siblings.
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They need reassurance that their mum will always make time for them. Spare like 15 minutes to spend with your first-born. Allow them to be a baby. They may revert to baby-like tendencies and its okay. It makes them feel better.
6.Don’t forget your spouse
Plan a weekly date night so you and your spouse can spend time together away from the kids and the house. You can also stay at home and save some time to catch up with your spouse.
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