Editorial

How to give your partner space without drifting apart

Often when your partner asks for space you think it’s their way of saying ‘it’s over’ without using those exact words. But we know sometimes space is needed for the

  • PublishedOctober 26, 2017

Often when your partner asks for space you think it’s their way of saying ‘it’s over’ without using those exact words. But we know sometimes space is needed for the sake of your relationship. Here’s how to get it right without drifting apart:

Don’t take it personal

Once you understand that you’re not the first person to go through this then you’ll handle this maturely. Your partner isn’t trying to hurt or push you way. Space could just be the one thing you need to renew and start your relationship afresh. The fact that he asked you instead of acting out of character says a lot about him, he values your relationship.

Do you

Relationships can be stressful hence this is the perfect time for you to use this as ‘me time’. Take up a hobby or go on holiday alone to get your mind off this sad period of your relationship. The break will sure feel long and lonely hence you should by all means try to not overthink it.

Set ground rules

As formal as it might sound, this is the only way you’ll appreciate the break without worrying if your significant other is seeing other people. The rules will include things like a timeline for your break and communication techniques. New York-based psychologist Kristin Davin suggests that you ask each other a series of questions such as, what’s the purpose of this break? What we’re going to do in the mean time and should it not work will you break up? Get this out of the way before you agree on the break.

Allow the feelings

A break will evoke mixed emotions hence relationship expert Kristina Marchant suggests that you allow yourself to feel them. However she doesn’t encourage that you act on them. Doing this is better than bottling things inside and eventually breaking down.

Tell him how you feel

A break is a two-way street. As much as he needs the break, you might feel this isn’t what your relationship needs. Come with alternatives that you think would best work for the two and together reach a decision.

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