SPOT THE RED FLAGS! Are you invested more in the relationship than your partner?
One of the hallmarks of a great relationship is being on the same page with the person you are dating or married to. Not so sure if you are reading from the same script with your partner? Read on for the red flags to watch out for.
When it comes to love, it is safe to say that no two people can love each other equally, and that’s fine. Problem comes in when there is a clear cut imbalance of love in the relationship. In such a case, the offended party might feel the burden of the relationship.
This ultimately leads to an unhealthy relationship and as someone once said, “If you’re giving love and not receiving it, you’re not in the right relationship. If you’re receiving it and not giving it, then you are taking advantage of the other person.” So how do you know that your partner might not be putting in as much of an effort as you do?
They don’t lend support: A relationship is a give and take affair and when this is not balanced, then cracks will surely emerge. If your partner does not lend you support in anyway, then chances are they are not connected to you or the relationship for that matter.
They are extremely emotional and sensitive: If your partner becomes emotional instead of rational when dealing with issues, then that is a red flag. A disconnected partner will be unconcerned about making the relationship thrive and you are likely to find yourself always apologising even when you have been wronged.
They don’t plan around your schedule: Do you drop everything so as to see your partner and your partner does not reciprocate? Then you are more invested in the relationship than your partner is. Their unwillingness to inconvenience themselves for the sake of the relationship might be a sign that things work on their terms and not yours. The best relationships are where two independent people decide to share their life journeys with the keyword here being ‘share.’
They rarely reach out first: It is no brainer that when you love someone, you think about them a lot and you may end up calling or even texting them often. If you are the one who constantly reaches out to your partner, then you guys need to talk ASAP! Another red flag is when your partner calls or texts everyone else but you. This is a clear signal that you are not their priority.
They are holding back:Another red flag to watch out for is when you sense that there is something that your partner won’t let you in on. It’s understandable if, at the beginning of a relationship, your partner maintains a sense of personal space and does not welcome you into their lives wholly.
However, for older relationships, there should really be no barrier. On the same note, if your partner is keeping you in the shadows instead of introducing you to friends and family, that is a big red flag. Tell your partner you are interested to meet some of their family members and if they are a keeper, they will be all about it.
And since we live in the age of social media, it should a cause of concern if you do not appear anywhere on your partner’s feed. A person who is invested in a relationship and has nothing to hide will not have qualms sharing a few moments online.
They only think of themselves:Know that you are on an unequal playing field when your partner always insists on picking where to go on holiday, what to eat for dinner or even what to watch on TV – basically putting themselves first. If this is the case, then you may want to discuss it with your partner.
