Contrary to popular belief, yelling at your kids does not correct behavior. Agreeably, when you have young ones, your patience gets tested from all corners. In such cases, should yelling at your kids be the best conflict resolution method? Read on to find out why not.
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It scares kids
When you snap at your young ones, the tone, and facial expression changes. You will find yourself (that is if you can even get a grasp of yourself in the heat of the moment) oozing a lot of anger. Your face will look scary and being at the top of your voice doesn’t auger well with children. They will freeze, flee or have a serious outcry burst.
Teaches children wrong conflict resolution methods
Did you know we often replicate in our parenting what our parents did to us? You are highly likely to be ingraining in your children that, if they are aggrieved, yelling is the way to drive their point home. Not only is this off, but it also limits your children from making better friendships. This goes hand in hand with our tips on how not to raise a bully.
Imagine yourself being shouted at by your boss. The fact that you always leave the office feeling like a failure and that they should have treated you better shows that you should avoid yelling at your kids.
Yelling at your kids does not assure behavior correction
Anyone can have their trigger pulled by a child who is repeating the same mistake for the thousandth time. Where it is true that children are bound to test one to the core, yelling as a reaction is ‘automatically normal’ but promises no behavior flip. No, actually it does. For the worst. If you want your kids to continue repeating the same mistake, somewhat deliberately, keep shouting.
When dealing with tweens and teens especially, keeping your temper at bay is of greater benefit. After all, you can’t speak soberly when yelling and your correction is filled with overtones of anger. It is not too late for anyone. You can correct your child’s narcissistic behavior nonetheless.
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It can mess up your child’s mental health
Every parent today should be concerned about supporting their child’s mental health as much as possible. With the current research showing that depression can begin even in the womb due to fetal stress, it should be everyone’s concern.
When you are yelling at your kids, it transmits a message that they are undervalued, worthless, stupid and a nuisance. Once your child starts sipping those brand-names deeply, they start being affected through depression, withdrawal and lack of life.
So, what should you do? Spanking? No. Try as much as you can to take notice when you are angry and take time out for yourself. Learn to speak to your children in a normal tone and correct them lovingly. Leave yelling at your kids only to when the house is on fire or there is an emergency.