Recently a local radio station aired a conversation about a man who divorced his wife after his mother asked him to. Listeners had a field day with varying views on the topic which begs the question, what would make one divorce their partner on mere demands from in laws? Some of the major reasons leading to ill-treatment from in-laws might be caused by misunderstanding or miscommunication.Below are tips on how you can win your in-laws over and have them eating from the palm of your hands.
Be true to yourself.
Karen Royalty once said, “Being yourself will eventually work out. If you try to be something or someone you are not, it will only lead to complications and heart ache down the line. Many people tend to put on masks in the early stages of their relationship so as to be accepted and loved. This might lead to a path full of lies and regrets. Be yourself. Let your in-laws love you for who you are. It will be better and more natural.
Treat them as family.
When you handle your in-laws as you would you blood family, the they will develop a great attitude towards you. Don’t compare your “perfect” family with your in laws. It might not be easy but no matter what, teach yourself to love and respect them, even with their weaknesses.
Let your spouse resolve any conflict.
Anytime there is a misunderstanding, let your partner talk to his or her people in the language they understand best. They will tend to receive the information positively. In addition, your partner is the intermediary between you and the in-laws. Each party should always defend their spouse in front of the in laws incase of any conflict. It should be clear to them that if they hurt you, they have hurt their family member.
No tree grows and bear fruits overnight. This holds true in the world of relationships. Give your relationship or marriage some time to grow. Yes, they might not like you now, but give them some space and a reason to love you. Show them that you are an asset not a liability. Don’t give up on the relationship easily. With time they will learn to love and accept you.
Let go of grudges.
Incase your in-law offends you, learn to forgive and avoid holding grudges against them. Do whatever it takes to get over the feelings of bitterness. Some bit of patience and maturity from your side will be required if you are to forgive. Granted it is not easy to forgive those who may willingly offend you, but it is worth all the pain in the end.
Include them in family functions
In-laws will always feel important if you include them in family functions such as get-togethers, birthdays or lunches. Take such functions as an opportunity to create good memories with the other camp. As you laugh together, the love and bond between you is also building.
Remember their roles in your partner’s life.
Never forget the people who brought up your spouse. They might be “unlikeable” but respect their role and position in your partner’s life. Learn some tacts on how to live with them and enjoy their company.