Positive Ways to Manage Visits from Extended Family Members
Understanding the dynamics
Extended family visits can be a joyful part of the holiday season, but they also come with unique challenges. Different personalities, routines, and expectations can create tension if not approached thoughtfully. Recognising this in advance helps parents navigate visits more smoothly.
Set clear boundaries
Before extended family arrives, discuss expectations with your household. This might include mealtime schedules, sleeping arrangements, or limits on device use. Clear boundaries protect your family’s energy while ensuring guests feel welcome.
Plan activities that include everyone
Structured activities can prevent boredom or conflict. Group games, shared cooking sessions, or holiday crafts allow everyone to participate, keeping interactions positive. This approach balances the needs of children, adults, and older family members.
Communicate with kindness
Misunderstandings often arise from assumptions. If conflicts appear, address them calmly and respectfully. Use “I” statements and focus on your feelings rather than blaming others. For example, “I feel overwhelmed when…” invites cooperation rather than defensiveness.
Involve children thoughtfully
Children may feel overlooked or overstimulated during extended family visits. Including them in tasks or decisions, such as setting the table or choosing a group game, helps them feel valued. It also teaches important social skills like sharing attention and compromise.
Know when to step back
Sometimes, the best approach is taking short breaks. A quiet walk, a few moments of reading, or simply retreating to another room can prevent tension from escalating and model healthy coping strategies for children.
Reflect and adjust
After visits, take time to reflect on what worked well and what could improve next time. This helps you build routines that support both your household and your extended family in future gatherings.
Extended family visits can be a highlight of the season when approached with intention, empathy, and clear communication. Thoughtful planning ensures that these moments are remembered for connection and joy rather than stress.
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