How to help your teenager overcome heartbreak

Do you remember what your first breakup felt like? It must have felt like your little, innocent heart was being grated. The worst part of this was, you could not discuss it with anyone, because you were not even allowed to date at that age in the first place.

Approaching your mum/dad with the news might have earned you a beating to eternity, yet it is at this moment that you must have needed her input, insight, perspective and comfort most. Your peers were just as clueless, and you could not even trust them to begin with. Thus you sucked up all that pain on your own, and it might have warped your view of relationships later in life.

Most parents now realize the importance of creating an environment that allows teenagers to approach them with matters life, relationships, sex and mental health. They had better learn from you, than from anyone else. If the course of all these your teenager tells you they are heartbroken, here is how to help them:

Do not lash at them

This is not the time to lash out at them for being in a relationship in the first place, they know. Just focus on helping them get over the pain first.

Do not dismissive of their emotions

They are actually hurt, surely you remember thinking you would get married to your first boyfriend / girlfriend. They too do not know better, and telling them off will only make them feel worse. Let them know that you understand how they are feeling

Offer a distraction every once in a while

They will most likely prefer to lock themselves in the room and cry themselves a river. Go shopping for new clothes go out for  dinner, go see a relative – just do something fun that will distract them in the meantime. Take care not to make them run away from the emotions, they have to come to terms with those.

Listen

Do not grow tired of listening to her – they need to vent. Try not to interject as they speak.

Business as usual

They can have a few days downtime to come to terms with the events, but do not allow them to wallow in their sadness too long.