Navigating mum guilt

You have probably realized motherhood did not make you a robot. It made you a human with additional responsibilities.

Responsibilities you feel you need to get right, lest you ruin the human you are raising. Although we have no manual on how to live life, I think we all agree that rest is paramount. Yet, most mothers struggle to rest.

So, how do you manage being a mum without breaking your back?

Lower your expectations

With the rise in family content creators, it is easier to feel like you and your family are failing. The babies on your screen seem well behaved but you cannot seem to bring yours to sit still? Well, it is content creation, a curated edited video.

I will not ask you to stop using social media, but follow content creators whose routines are more relatable. If you go to work, follow working mums, if you have one nanny follow content creators with one nanny. Follow content creators who are honest with you, and who also share the struggles of motherhood.

Delegate

Whenever you can, delegate. If you need more time playing with your child, have someone else wash the dishes. For working mums, do what you need to do and let the others take on responsibility. Delegating duties takes off items from your to-do list giving you ample time to rest and to spend time with your kids.

Find easy ways to take a break

Avoiding mum guilt involves integrating your self-care into your daily routine. By doing this, self-care stops feeling like something you do to run away from motherhood.

For example, if you enjoy a home spa day and must spend the weekend with the children, make a homemade child-friendly mask.

Blend oatmeal and breast milk and apply a thin layer on the baby’s skin. This way you get to do something you enjoy while spending time with your children.

Ask your kids to participate

Write down a list of activities that soothe you. Make these activities child-friendly then ask your kids which one they want to do first.

For example, if you want to go on a walk, ask them what route they would love to take. Make it fun by picking flowers, and pebbles or racing back home. Sometimes a fussy child just wants to sit next to you as you read.

Friendship

Make friends with other parents. Having friends makes parenting easier. For example, carpooling; taking turns driving the kids to and from school. This way every parent gets extra minutes to themselves.

Also, have a friend who is steps ahead of you in life. A friend a decade older will offer advice, ground you, and sometimes be your child’s godparent.

The best mum in the world sounds like a great title. But you might not enjoy the title when you are too tired.

Even machines need oil maintenance, take a break before you break!