Editorial

7 reasons why he won't make a commitment

PublishedJuly 15, 2021

It is no secret that men tend to shy away from commitment not because they are unable or don’t want to commit but because the mere thought of commitment frightens them. Commitment in a relationship, entails among other things, vulnerability. In a society that has groomed men to be strong, stable, and secure, it is easy to see why vulnerability does not sit well with them.

Besides, societal constructs and perception of men as strong, the following are some of the reasons why why men avoid making a commitment:

1. Fear

This is probably the main reason why many of us do not commit. We are afraid of what will happen if it does not work out with our partner. The question “What If?” constantly plays through our minds. We think of all the potential partners we missed out on that could have been something special.

2. Fear of relinquishing control

Men tend to value their independence more than women. For most men, committing means losing their independence and answering to someone else. The thought of change from being the drivers of their lives to be controlled by another person is simply overwhelming.

3. Maturity

With any commitment made in life there is a level of maturity that is required especially since not everyone matures at the same pace. In a committed relationship a person must be willing to grow up and leave certain habits and thinking patterns in the past. Some men are not ready or mature enough to be in a committed relationship and you cannot force anyone to do something that they do not want to.

4. Too busy

Life can be extremely demanding at times and sometimes men have a difficult time balancing everything that they are dealing with. Whether it be work, a previous relationship or other personal issues sometimes men find it hard to commit because they simply do not have the time to dedicate to a relationship. A busy man may enjoy the freedom of something more casual a date here and there, but a full-time commitment really is not an option for them.

5. Mistrust

Trust is everything. If someone doesn’t feel that they can trust their partner commitment is pretty much out of the question, especially for a man. A man will not show any signs of commitment until he is sure that trust is guaranteed and not a potential issue.

6. Overwhelming pressure

Men do not like a nagging woman. If you are a lady pressuring your man to commit, you might as well give up now. Commitment should be your partners own will. Getting him to commit under pressure will just lead to future problems in the relationship. If a man’s love for you is genuine, he will eventually make the decision to commit. Just be patient!

7. He is seeing other people

At times men do not want to commit because they are not done playing the field. A man who still desires to be with other women will be in no hurry to commit as he will feel like he is losing out on something. Men tend to keep their options open until they are confident enough to make the decision to commit to their partner.

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