Behind the Silence: Why Not All Abortions Are a Choice

When people hear the word “abortion”, they often imagine a simple choice, something that is planned or deliberate. The reality is far more complicated. For many, the path to that decision didn’t start at a clinic; it began in silence, in fear, and within a system that failed girls long before they ever walked through a medical door.

The global weight of betrayal

Globally, an estimated 650 million girls and women alive today have been subjected to sexual violence as children (including both contact and non-contact forms of abuse), according to 2024 estimates from UNICEF. This equates to approximately 1 in 5 girls and women who have experienced some form of sexual violence before the age of 18.

In Kenya, the situation is equally urgent. According to the 2022 Kenya Demographic and Health Survey (KDHS), which is conducted by the Kenya National Bureau of Statistics in collaboration with the Ministry of Health, 15% of girls aged 15–19 have been pregnant at least once. Furthermore, the survey data indicates that 12% of girls in this age bracket have already had a live birth. These figures highlight how early pregnancies remain a significant public health and social challenge for teenagers in the country.

The silencing

Most of these stories begin at home, schools or churches. Girls and women are abused by people they know and trust: a teacher, neighbour, pastor, relative or a family friend. Too often, the victims are silenced to protect the family’s reputation. They are told to stay silent, pray harder and forgive the perpetrator. They are rarely asked, “What happened to you?” instead they are asked, “What will people say?”

Families sometimes force the girls to carry pregnancies that came from abuse, and in some cases, the girls are abandoned completely. Very few girls are asked what they need to feel safe again.

Abortion is a symptom, not a cause

As a society, we must stop the pretence that every pregnancy is born of love or choice. We must stop pretending that every girl has the right to say no.

For many, an abortion is not an act of convenience; it is a desperate attempt at survival. It is a frantic effort to reclaim a body that was stolen. When a girl or woman seeks an abortion, she is often responding to a chain of failures:

• The failure of the state to prosecute predators.

• The failure of the church to provide a true sanctuary.

• The failure of the family to prioritise her life over honour.

When she is abandoned by her family or forced to carry the physical reminder of her trauma, the choice was made for her long ago by the adults who looked the other way.

Normalising the conversation

It is time to normalise the uncomfortable. We need to talk about the rot beneath it all. Until we address the sexual violence that precedes the pregnancy, we are merely shouting at the smoke while the house is still on fire.

If we want to reduce abortions, we must first start by protecting our girls. We must start by believing them. Because when a girl seeks a way out, it isn’t because she is careless but because the world she trusted left her with no other choice.

For more, click HERE to join our WhatsApp channel!